Tulpamancy Journal. 217

Sunday, May 9, 2021

7:34 AM

Another day of frustrating practice. Hints (of presence) and touches (from her),  over the noise of my mind in meditation. I have been a meditator for many years. I have never worried about what my mind was doing, as I didn’t look for a particular result. Now, after an invocation, then trying to remain silent in my head (and heart, that was the word trying to come onto the page) I get hints and touches. When I hear an actual sentence, said by her, it is her ‘scolding’ me. I have been thinking that while my daily writing practice, concerns her, it is not ‘by her’ or even directly about her. Perhaps that is the problem and she believes that I am locking her out. In the past I gave her time to write her own story and to write letters to me. If I can, I will see if I am able to do that again. I do want to know what she is feeling.

critiques welcome. Dr. Robert

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