Tulpamancy Journal. 317

Saturday, January 21, 2023, 8:32 AM

Galantamine 12mg at 2:30AM, dreamt of first wife in park with many children. I note that they seem to have been from an institution and are on an outing. A few come by us, out of curiosity. They are nice and leave after a while. I somehow know, that the institution has changed its policy regarding the use of psychotropic meds and the children and no longer being drugged. Rita leaves and I follow her. We are going to hike to the beach. She decides to take a short cut through a tunnel. I find I am too large to enter it, so stay on the trail over the mountain. I join a group of men, all larger, and we hike together.  The trail takes us to a cliff edge overlooking the beach. The trail veers off to the left and I am aware that it is a long way around and down to the beach. Some men find another tunnel, this one is large enough to handle us and I follow some of the others into it. It is well lit, but almost vertical and I am falling until I come to a soft stop where the tunnel bends. I emerge out onto the verge bordering the beach. Rita is not there, I call for her, but give up and go home to the house in which I lived when I was 13 years old. I am on the couch with a red haired middle aged woman whom I do not recognize. (I am not 13, I am my current age.) I see a lot of children, same ones who were in the park, enter my back yard, they are meeting with some councilors. One young man, perhaps 13, is  sitting on the couch next to me. A red haired pig jumps up on my lap. The woman says it belongs to Josh. I pet it, it is very friendly and gets a little rambunctious so I shoo it away.  I notice the young man next to me, he is very shy and looks sad. I comment to the woman about the change in policy re: meds. I turn to the young man, I should say boy, and say to him that he can do it, it might be hard, but I can see he will be  okay. He smiles, a beatific smile. I notice the woman has the same smile. She says to me that I am an awesome man. I hold the two of them in my arms, seeing their beauty. I am crying when my alarm goes off.

I go into my morning meditation (as directed by  my  alarm at 6:00AM) My mood is much different. My body is hurting in many places. I have a headache, my neck is very sore and stiff. Many of my arthritic joints are paining me. I have an image of a ticker-tape moving along the bottom of my visual fields. The word NAMBIC, or NIMBIC, is repeated at intervals. This gets my attention as it featured in a dream several nights ago. I do not know what it means, but it is insistent. I associate it with an island in a lake and a witch. It stays with me throughout the meditation. I quit the session two minutes early. (I have another alarm set for 6:30AM ) I come out of the session and decided I will have to wait and let this mystery resolve itself. Nancy is awake when I move to turn off my alarm and we cuddle and talk about her difficulty with her brain dysfunction and I am able to bring her some comfort. Later we enjoy completing the NYT Spelling Bee together. It is now 9:00AM and my headache is persisting.

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