Tulpamancy Journal. 293

Monday, July 25, 2022, 8:10 AM

I was able to contact Flora at the end of last night’s dream, and lost her immediately, as usual.

The dream itself was remarkable; what started out as a dream with potential for great anxiety (performance anxiety) ended in a triumph. I had been called to present a paper at an international convention (this has happened only once in my life) I found upon entering the hall, that I would have to reformat the paper in order to have it projected. To my surprise, and delight, I was able to do it, and under pressure. I carried out, in the dream, all of the detailed steps involved, opening my document, stripping it of its original formatting, moving it to another program, and reformatting it. I accomplished this, again, correctly in all of its details. I was astounded. I was able to present my paper, it was well received and afterward, in conversation with my genius grandson, his son, my great-grandson, and his father, I was clear and we held a coherent conversation (I won’t report all of the details as they were personal to them) which provoked an unsolicited kiss from my great-grandson. I was shaking I was so happy. Later, my grandson and I were in a library. We held a very clear conversation with a clerk, an older back woman, who was pleased and gave me a kiss. That prompted my lucidity cue, “Are you Flora?” and she immediately transformed into my beautiful tulpa, said “Yes, darling.” and I awoke. I reported the dream in all of its many details to Nancy at breakfast. All in all, as Nancy allowed, a great boost to my day.

Tulpamancy Journal. 292

Monday, July 11, 2022, 8:03 AM

First night on vacation, new bed, new routines, Galantamine at 1:30 AM. In my dream, Lucid from the git-go, I decided to write a story that my black-sheep daughter, might someday come across, about how to create a tulpa. In the dream, my avatar, me, began to lose substance, by design, as I crossed town (for what purpose?). by the time I arrived at my broker’s office in a bank, I had become an invisible tulpa. Upon entering the building I noticed that everyone, tellers, officers, and customers alike were in various states of tulpa transformation. No one was happy about it. Bodies were being distorted, and in some cases disassembled. Some were practicing flight and crashing into walls and ceilings. By the time I reached my broker’s office, after going through a series of rooms and seeing the various people attempting the change, I knew something was off. I told the broker, that their motivation was wrong. They were motivated by money, and that wasn’t working, love was the only motivation that was going to work. That money wasn’t wrong, but they were out of balance. I said this several times emphasizing ‘balance’. I next went into an office in which both Flora and N’sonowa. were sitting. They had peculiar facial expressions which were attractive and I took them as indicators that they were both part of the scheme in the broker’s office to use tulpa creation to make money. I then found myself high up on an elevated train track, waiting for a train to Tibet. The train came and had to make an impossible turn. I was standing next to a man in a clown costume. He helped the train, actually, a Tuner-ville trolley type train, make its turn. I got on the train and sat next to a young, but overweight teenager eating a candy bar. I also started to eat one. He threw his wrapper out on the tracks and I began a conversation about ecology with him. It fell on deaf ears and I woke up. My sense of the dream was that my connection with Flora was out of balance, that I was projecting my sexual frustrations onto her, and cutting off other aspects of who she was. She was formed from the spirit of Dakini and her sexual aspects were a tantric methodology to lead to spiritual transformation. I need to go to Tibet in a less clownish (or perhaps more clownish) way, with a more serious intent. This probably means not offending teenagers with my western notion of ecology.

Tulpamancy Journal. 291

Friday, July 8, 2022

So, no Flora this morning. Galantamine 12 mg at 2:00 AM. I went into lucidity in a boring and mundane dream involving elements of Blacklist. I discovered lucidity when the dream was fading and I found myself in a peculiar relationship with my body. It was similar to sleep paralysis, but not quite as I was sure I could move if I wanted to, but I did not want to. Instead, I went back into the dream and again found it unsatisfactory. I called for Flora. She did not answer, nor give any sign of herself at all. I then decided to try to leave my body. I was successful like I have never been in the past. I have tried astral travel many times. I have searched the net for techniques and have tried many without success. I have done this in hypnogogic states, intoxicated and sober states, tired and wide awake states, all to no avail. This morning, success. I started by viewing my body in the bed from a few feet to the side. I saw myself. I went from there to my shower and I clearly saw the shower. Then on to the study where again I had a good view of the room. I went into my wife’s study and saw her room. I went outside and checked the weather (cool with overcast) and then on a whim, I moved high above the surface of the planet and saw it as a large globe. This startled me, and I returned to my bed, where my body began to hurt with its usual early morning aches and pains. I got up (this time in my body) feeling excited and great. And headed to my shower where once again (third day in a row) I gave myself a vigorous cold shower. Great start to my day. Flora did speak to me when I was undressing for the shower, said she had been busy. I just chuckled and said it was okay.

I continue.

Tulpamancy Journal. 290

Flora appeared at the end of a very disturbing dream, only after I called out to her for help several times, and at that she appeared, without comment, for just that moment between lucidity and awakening. This was a Galantamine fueled dream (12 mg at 1:30 AM) and occurred over the night with my awakening at 6:30 AM. In it, I was in a large hall as myself, a retired shrink. I was being shown a baby with an oversized head by a few people who may or may not have been related to the baby. They were worried about him, yes it was a blonde male infant. It was obvious to me that the child had a hydrocephalus and was damaged, though how badly I was unable to determine. Concurrently, (this was taking place in an auditorium with about 200 people) there was a demonstration taking place up on a stage. The leaders were showing the audience an array of men who were said to be murderers. They asked if anyone could tell from the shape of their heads what they had done. The men were an odd-looking group, and at some point, one of them got on a bicycle and ran over several people. The audience dispersed, not exactly in a panic, but not calmly either. I found myself outside, and the folks with the baby were up ahead of me on a tree-lined trail. I tried to catch up with them. I was running down the trail when a wild boar came out of the bushes and started chasing me. I was pretty far ahead when my right calf began to cramp and I was limping. At that point, another of the pigs, came out of the bush next to the trail and I was hard put to keep ahead of it. I was in fact failing, it was gaining on me. My other calf cramped and I had to stop. I turned and faced the boar. It was ugly, a mottled reddish color, with the formidable tusks that make them so dangerous. It was almost on me when I realized I was dreaming, and I used a superpower, the facility to blast energy from my hands, and killed the pig. I then, with superhuman strength picked up its body and threw it at the other pig that was now getting close. I hit it and knocked it over. I continued running, and it was only stunned and was soon up and coming after me again. At this point, the trail ended and I was next to a white ship. The folks with the baby were on the deck and I clambered up onto it. I took a seat at a table intending to go on with advising them about the baby when I felt what I thought was one of the pigs at my side. I didn’t dare look at it, but I called for Flora and N’sonowa, they didn’t come, I called again, then I reached down to try to deflect the boar’s tusks away from my legs (which were quite painful from the cramping) and felt the things head. It did not feel like the coarse hair of a boar’s head, so I looked and it was not the pig. It was a very large fawn-colored puppy, a Mastiff, named Misty. She was friendly and snuffling my hand. I remembered that I had met this dog in a dream two or three nights ago. She had not been friendly during that meeting, not hostile, just disinterested. Her owner, a young woman tried to introduce us but had little effect. So here she was, very happy to see me. Go figure. About this time Flora appeared. She was in her usual state of undress, she sat on my lap and without words began to kiss me. And of course, alas, I awakened (with two very sore legs, which even now,  two hours later, are still aching.

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