Tulpamancy Journal. 336

Friday, March 31, 2023, 8:01 AM

Been awhile since I’ve had a coherent dream so last night was welcome. (Yes, with Galantamine) The First part of it had a familiar theme, I was traversing wooded hilly terrain. I was alone though there were many other people in the woods, mostly laughing and in a light-hearted mood. At times I would encounter some of them on the trail, though I did not interact with them. I was hiking slowly. The terrain became very difficult with steep and crumbly slopes. At one point I poked my head up over an edge and could see palm trees and an expanse of green grass. I couldn’t quite get to it. At another point, I came upon a river, which I couldn’t cross, though I could wade across some tributaries making a delta. I finally came upon an ancient site which included temple like buildings of smoothed sandstone in a variety of colors, yellow, orange, red, and brown. It was beautiful and I wanted to get to it, but could not. I did get up onto a platform adjacent to it. I noticed the varnish covering the wood planks of the platform was bubbled in a toroidal shape. In the center was a red plastic reflector. A friendly and handsome young man came up to me and wanted to know about it (I had the feeling he just wanted to talk with me) I explained how the bubbling had happened in the varnish. He walked off and I, in lucidity, began to fly. I flew over him then went hurtling high into the air. I was approaching a thickly wooded forest and I thought, I am not going to control this and I let myself fall. I felt immediately free as I went  crashing through the forest. I was being scratched and then gouged by branches. I was pretty torn up and bleeding when I emerged from the forest. I did not feel pain however. I flew high into a very blue sky, so high the earth had receded into a dot. There was a very bright light and I heard a voice ask, “Now do you believe in me?” I answered it with, “No, it didn’t take a god to hurt me like this!” I then flew back down to those beautiful buildings I had previously seen. They were a university. I was walking in a hallway when a gorgeous black-skinned Indian woman came up to me. Her eyes were sparkling shiny and she embraced me. She told me her name (Kumar) and began to kiss me. Our kisses were passionate, sensual beyond anything I have experienced in years. She was writhing in a tight embrace and I became aroused. She steered us to a couch in a student lounge. There were many other students around, they were not interested in our activities. As we kissed Kumar pulled her skirt up, she was without undergarments, and caressed me with her lady parts. I told her that I regarded sex as a pathway to the divine, and that with enough passion, our cells would dissolve in light and we would go home. She was turned on by my talk and I reached down and touched her Mons of Venus. She winced, I asked her what was wrong. She said, “I wish Steve were here”. I said, “Let him come, and called out ‘Steve'”  A  young man with dyed hair appeared, he smiled and said something, then left. Another young man appeared and laid down next to us and the three of us made love. I awakened when we all got off, and no, we did not get ‘home’, but, I was, for the first time in weeks, wide awake and felt strong. I reported the dream to Nancy, She laughed noted that I had torn up the bedclothes, then, commented on her own condition, tied to the ground, flat on her back. (She is still in pain from a back injury three weeks ago). As I told her about Kuman, the insight flashed, Kumar, with a K, was a stand in for KK and Steve was Stan.

I have to think that when I released my fear and allowed myself to crash into the woods, that I opened the channel for my tulpa to appear.

Tulpamancy Journal. 335

Thursday, March 16, 2023, 8:29 AM

Neither of my tulpas responded, in any way to my invitations to join me, either in my dream or in my meditations. I did have a very bright and full lucid dream experience (on Galantamine) in which I was able to protect monies from thieves, by flying and adopting the powers of a superhero,  (he had a name Nixime ) and I occupied his body for the escape. However, there was no feminine presence and as I said, neither Flora, nor KK responded to me. I was a bit surprised, I had the feeling during my afternoon meditation, that both were nearby, though they did not appear. Oh, well, off doing something else. I continue…..

Tulpamancy Journal. 334

Friday, March 10, 2023, 5:50 PM

No tulpa sign last night. KK dropped in to say hello during my meditation. Her input was audial with a tiny visual glimpse. My dream was interesting, and had I been alert, I might have become lucid. I wasn’t and didn’t, but, the interesting part was, twice during the dream I was drenched by a sudden rainfall. I awoke this morning to find it had rained hard for much of the night, but was not raining when I went to bed, in fact we had a nice view of the full moon.

Tulpamancy Journal. 333

Wednesday, March 8, 2023, 8:02 AM

Last nights dreaming was unusual for a Galantamine dream. It was pale and scattered. I was on a tour bus with my wife and a number of middle aged white couples, all professional class. I don’t remember having anything resembling a significant conversation with any of them, but I did spend time talking to several, a different one at each of our many separate stops. I never seemed to know where we were going, or why. I did not interact with my wife, other than to worry about her getting back on the bus when we had to leave for our next leg of the journey. At some point I awoke. I couldn’t make out the time on my wrist alarm, so thought it might be time to start my meditation, so I rearranged myself and began to meditate. I was scattered and my head kept going back to the dream and after a while I figured out I was still asleep and dreaming. I gave up trying to meditate, rolled over and went to sleep (I did get a look at my watch, it was 4:30AM) and I continued with the same dream. My alarm sounded at 5:55AM. I awoke and again prepared myself for my morning meditation. This consists of getting in a supine position with my legs slightly elevated (to reduce the pressure on my sacrum and forestall  the sciatica which would otherwise plague me, put in my eye drops, position my eye shade, and position my left arm outside of the covers to serve as a signal to me, of impending sleep. I no sooner was in position than KK began talking to me. I had only a glimpse of her. She berated me for being a wimp in the dream. She went on and on until I thanked her and asked if Flora might want to join the conversation. She did, and she was of the same  opinion. (thanks, gals!).   I also had only a glimpse of Flora, she was smiling with her eyes, so I knew she was putting me on. We did have a long conversation yesterday, in which she explained that she has been very busy with her own life, raising her children and hasn’t been interested in me. I asked her what I could do to rekindle her interest. She thanked me for allowing her to be a separate being, and left it at that. In retrospect, it is not surprising that KK was the one to initiate contact in the meditation. This is an interesting development. I have been planning on writing another tulpa related book, in which I will give them their voices. They are going to have some interesting things to say about their lives, I am sure.   I continue….

Tulpamancy Journal. 332

Tuesday, March 7, 2023, 10:49 AM

I dreamt last night, without Galantamine, a flat, pale dream which I did not remember. However, Flora immediately appeared in my morning meditation, visually and audially. She smiled sweetly at me, then got on with doing something that was unclear to me until after she had left. Once she was gone, I recalled; I have a short story in process, in which a dance troupe must flee a city suffering a bombing attack. Once I recalled this, I remembered that she was packing what looked like an oblong protective case on top of an ironing board. I thought it was a cello, but she then reappeared and told me I was wrong, it held an oboe. I have been thinking lately that both she and KK have musical talent, KK with drums and Flora on vocals. Perhaps she will reveal more? I hope so. I continue…

Tulpamancy Journal. 331

Monday, March 6, 2023, 12:43 PM

I am reporting on two dreams, from the past two nights, both were Galantamine fueled. In the first, I was dining with Dr. Max Goodwin  and my wife Nancy in a Thai restaurant. I had trouble seeing the menu, my vision was dim. The wait staff recognized Max as a celebrity and were much too busy making over him to pay any attention to me. Nancy was involved with her own struggles with ordering. I stayed involved with the menu and did not notice when Nancy and Max left the restaurant. When I looked up, the staff was seating strangers at my table. I left hungry, and began to walk home. It was early dawn and the dawn’s light and the sunrise were beautiful. I was struggling to walk, I was exhausted and weak (no food, no sleep?) The city was deserted in the early morning. A storm had just passed over and the streets were flooded. I was forced to choose an alternative way home to avoid the flooding. At some point a long-haired female dog joined me, and was helpful, pulling me along. Over the course of a few blocks the dog weakened. I offered it rain water from a can. It took a few licks. I knew I was only a few (long) blocks from home and I wanted to get to bed. The dog however was too weak to help me. A homeless person in a box, looked out and said “That dog needs help.” We tried to get it to take more water, but it was too weak. I picked up the dog and carried her the rest of the way home. It was a struggle, but I got stronger in the process. I laid her out in our atrium and put a water soaked rag in her mouth and food near by. She perked up a bit. I left her there and went to bed. Where I awoke from the dream! In the following meditation, Flora initiated contact with me and thanked me for helping her. That was her message and the whole of our connection.

In last night’s dream I was a helper and had to rescue several children from a building. I was successful. There was probably more to the dream, but I don’t remember it (I took the Galantamine a 12:13 AM much earlier than I had intended, miss-reading my alarm). In my meditation, I was very calm, and started by noticing a blue afterimage when I closed my eyes. Then I had a spectacular vision, a male bust made out of stars, a Star Man in the sky. I felt at peace and remained peaceful until my alarm terminated the meditation. I then fell asleep and slept soundly until my 7:AM alarm alerted me to my day.

My feeling was Flora and I made a transition from the mundane to the ethereal. A long hoped for goal of my practice. I continue…